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    This is our corner of the Internet. We're happy here. We're definitely "we" -- this blog is a group project. We all post as "My Own". This is where we write the things we can't say on our own blogs for one reason or another. We hope you like it here as much as we do. We hope you'll stick around.


  • If you hurt my feelings, and I tell you that you've hurt my feelings, the correct response is not to tell me how misinformed I am or tell me that you're sorry you didn't explain your position better. The implication of such a decision is that it's my fault I feel hurt and devalued, and that you couldn't possibly have made better choices to avoid this outcome. This makes me feel worse, not better.
    Of course, if your intention is to make me feel worse rather than mend the rift in our relationship, then I guess you responded appropriately. But if you really are sorry I feel bad, then you might try, "I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings. I never meant to make you feel devalued, and I hope you'll accept my apology."

    My friend who has cancer has found out today that it’s not life threatening.  It’s incurable, so she will have to live with it for the rest of her life and learn how to manage it when she’s in and out of remission, but it’s not life threatening!  Happy!  Better than “Can be cured, but more likely to die soon.” (I think.)

    Last night a friend told me that she was called by her pharmacist. They told her that her birth control had been recalled, it was full of placebos rather than the normal hormone gradient. 
    She's quasi-dating someone right now, she says she's madly in love with him, he refuses to officially date her, just lets him mother her (he's almost 40 but apparently "still hung up over his ex").
    This has been going on for the past year. She's desperately in love with him. He's considering going back to his home country. This is devastating for her. 
    She's already got multiple children, loves children, is clearly very fertile, and is apparently extremely concerned that she could be pregnant. 
    And here's where I come in. While this woman is a friend of mine, I know her to be manipulative. She's a good person but I can't help but wonder how much of this is the truth, and if she'd actually stoop so low as to "trap" him in a pregnancy. 
    I hate to think that she would do that, but about a year ago she accidentally got pregnant by another guy. She had to terminate the pregnancy because it for some reason made her very very very ill and strained her heart. 
    When I mentioned that to her last night, her response was "oh no worries, I had a physical last week and I'm good to go."
    I looked up drug recalls this morning. 
    There has been a highly publicized drug recall in the US, but none of what I read indicated the drugs had been sold in Canada. 
    I checked Health Canada's list of drug recalls, nothing there either. 
    I don't want to accuse her of anything, but it seems like she might be lying. And I don't know if I can be friends with her if my suspicions (which I admit, are horrid and not very friend-like) are true. 
    Have I been reading too many conspiracy novels? Do 'real' people do this sort of thing? When does one say something?

    We all have our own challenges and walls to climb, which can feel insurmountable to each of us… but I found out today that a good friend of mine has cancer… somehow, makes most of my problems seem a little less significant.  She’s so optimistic and positive it makes my heart ache for a good outcome for her and her two boys.  I need a hug.

    I need to make new friends, I need to find a best friend.

    I have friends but I've realized that I am none of their best friends. When I realized this about my oldest friend, I was inclined to feel hurt, but I wasn't - just cause we've been friends FOREVER doesn't make us best friends - we have different interests, her best friend shares more of her interests.

    When I think of all my friends and contemplate each of their circles of friends, there is not one I want to become a bigger part of, no acquaintances that make me think, "I should get to know her/him better."

    So how, as an adult, with a busy work and family life and many solitary interests, do I make new friends???

    I work in a unionized workplace where middle management is also part of the union.

    Since they are part of union, their loyalties should be to the union members and not to the big boss man.

    That's not the case where I work.

    My boss is a bitch!


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